Yardage Junkies & Range Balls
The plethora of GPS units, measuring devices and detailed course planners now available has given rise to the ‘Yardage Junky’. Whether you swear by the gadgetry or not, we’ve all seen people now compelled to calculate the distance to the inch as an essential part of their pre-shot routine. I think I’ll invent the word “inchage”, as it seems these days a “yardage” just doesn’t measure up (no pun intended).
Now, I could go on a rant about how many amateur golfers can consistently hit to a yardage, throwing in points about slow play and anecdotes of hapless calculations and ensuing card-wrecking disasters. But I’ll save that tirade for another week and instead lay to rest an issue that many people still seem not to understand.
I feel well placed to offer my opinion on this. I’ve done my time on the driving range – I was indeed once a Range Rat. Yes that’s right, I was that guy driving the tractor down the middle of the range collecting the balls. I say tractor, but “magnet” may be a better description, as every ball seems to be aimed directly at you, intentionally or not. All very amusing, of course, for those with club in hand, that is until that moment between club striking ball and ball striking tractor, when you’re confronted with the terrifying realisation that you might actually be about to kill someone. The “don’t worry, I’m fine” wave is always a very welcome sight. For those of us that have experienced the other side of it, there’s a long list of not particularly kind adjectives we’d use to describe those persistently hitting balls in your direction, but I digress.
Getting back to the point, one of the perks (if you can call it that) of being a Range Rat, is that you quickly learn about range balls. I’ll concede it’s not an interesting topic in itself, but the reason I bring it up is in respect of those Yardage Junkies. I can’t begin to tell you how many people waste their time figuring out their distances on the range hitting those range balls (or at least the ones most of us encounter) believing they go the same distance as proper golf balls. They don’t. They really don’t. They’re mass produced, cheap, made of one piece of rubber, and are only slightly more aerodynamic than a brick.
The difference in yardage isn’t too marked if you’re talking about a 100 yard wedge shot, but the moment you start hitting 5 and 6 irons, the disparity is so great that anyone calculating their club distances on the driving range will have some pretty inaccurate club measurements. What good is it then figuring out your exact yardages out on the course? It’s all very well knowing you’ve got 167 yards to the front, 172 yards to get past the bunker and 178 yards to the flag, but none of that is going to help when your 5 iron is about to fly 20% further than you’re expecting. Unless of course, you’re playing golf with range balls, which is something else I’ve sadly witnessed on far too many occasions – golfers nabbing a few balls to tee up on the course… if only they knew they were giving themselves a 20-30% handicap off the tee!
So in short, for the new Yardage Junkies out there, if you do insist on working out the “inchage” on every shot, please do help yourself and those you’re playing with by keeping away from the funky old range balls when you’re doing your homework. Doing it properly using some standard golf balls will save you shots and save us the pain of witnessing the umpteenth green being “airmailed”, followed by the “I can’t believe how far that 5 iron went”. Thank you!